My balls are so social today.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I have aggressive nipples.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
