so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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