The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
