if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Randomize
