Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize