it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Randomize
