3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
I seem to have left my pride at pride
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Randomize
