never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize