I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
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