We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Randomize
