I am puke
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize