She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Randomize
