their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
