We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
