Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
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