im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize