no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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