Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Randomize
