Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
