Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
But break dance skills will only take you so far
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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