this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Houston, we have a squirter
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Randomize