return my video game
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
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