Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
vagina is talking i cant
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
