He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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