Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
