I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Randomize
