Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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