What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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