New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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