No subtext here. People are naked.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
So. Much. Porn.
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