He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I'm just crazy horny about you
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
