I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
