Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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