I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
Randomize
