I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
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