Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
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