She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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