She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Randomize