Midget sex pt 2 tonight
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
This toilet bowl is my home.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
