real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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