We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
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