then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Randomize
