I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
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