this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
