he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
There's always time for handjobs
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Randomize
