He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
