sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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