She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
It was like getting head from an anaconda
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
