I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Randomize
