thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
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